I suppose you all deserve a post...even though I have no idea where anyone is..hmm. Why is the blogging world so quiet?
OH! I KNOW!!!!!
IT'S SUMMER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm so psyched. =)
I have like no plans..except, read. paint. be with friends. and try to figure life out. Haha.
I just came back from a weekend at Newfound Lake with the youth group. It was incredible. So amazing. It's so beautiful up there, and being with people I'm comfortable with and whom I love is awesome. =) I had to make a list of all the things I need to remember, for a very long time.
Like singing Christmas carols, karaoke, in the summer. Classic youth group.
And there was a huge thunder and lightening storm, it actually started hailing.
Swinging in the hammock (I'm in love with hammocks now...I want one so badly. haha.) with Kaeleigh saving mutilated animal crackers by eating them to end their misery. We're girls...we're naturally compassionate. =D
I will definitely try to post this summer. We'll see if you do... =P

Life revolves around the need

Of having someone.

Causing every complicated feeling.

I don’t want to loose you

And there is nothing wrong, with

Telling me what you need

To keep our love strong.

Sanctus Real - We Need Each Other

Seems to me, that life has become one giant gray area. Maybe it's just my teenage brain confusing me. Or...maybe it's not.
I wonder a lot if it's my business to tell my friend ( all this is hypothetical) that she shouldn't be thinking like that. Should I back off cuz it's her business?
I wonder if I should keep my mouth shut when they're all talking about that "subject" too much...or should I say something because they're becoming obsessed?
Is it just my life that has become gray?
Some people pefer their life to be colorful. I like black and white. It might be boring at times, but you can see clearly. There isn't a haze of random colors blinding and confusing.
One day I know all the answers. The next day I know nothing.
One day I know what I believe, the next day I have no idea what's a lie and what's the truth.
It's infuriating, to wake up, know who you are, then later, wonder if you're the same person you were yesterday.
I don't know if it's my identity I'm trying to figure out. Or it's God's little reminder that I'm falling too far behind him. It's probably both.
I'm not depressed, just confused. I'm not unhappy, just feeling a little unbalenced. I know I'll figure it all out, eventually. I only know this, because I keep going back to the one thing that saves me everytime. And trust me, I need a lot of saving sometimes.
Part of me doesn't even know why I'm posting this. Haha. I want to know what you guys think. If you feel the same way sometimes. At the moment I'm just really confused about a lot. If you have any answers, let me know. =)

Hello! I'M ALIVE!!

This isn't a long post. I'm sorry. =(
It's just a post to say "HI!!!" and I'm still alive and breathing and well. =)
I've been trying to focus on school more than anything else, because I should be finished next week!!! I'll try to fit a nice long post in between though for y'all. =P

Hmmm???????

Does it bug you now? hmmmmm? =) hehehe All Time Low rocks...

Play it to see what it is... =D

UPDATES!!!

UPDATES!!!!!! Cuz you're all so stalker-ish and need to know everything about my life. Heehee.

Saw Ironman yesterday...IT WAS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't even begin to describe it's awesomeness...Meghan can vouch me. It's my new favourite movie. Seriously. (Did anyone notice the 'u' in 'favourite'? haha those Brits. They have such an effect. =P)

I forgot to welcome Nina to my blog!!! I'm sorry Nina, you have your very own mention here. =) thanks for checking out my blog and commenting, you're always welcome! Beware of my craziness though...just saying.

Last weekend I went to a girl conference with Tori, Ashlee, Kaeleigh and Brianna. It was amazing. I learned so much about my Lord and Savior I had forgotten. Like how much He loves me. =) The whole experience was pretty new and different, but I liked the camp. The speaker, Bethany Needham, was soooo funny! It was her first time speaking, but it sure didn't seem like it.

Anywho....what do I say now...?

I Am A Christian

I wish I written this. =) It says exactly how I feel.

Christians - By Maya Angelou

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin".
"I'm whispering "I was lost, Now I'm found and forgiven."

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
and need Christ to be my guide.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong.I'm professing that I'm weak
And need His strength to carry on.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
And need God to clean my mess.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible
But, God believes I am worth it.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain.
I have my share of heartaches
So I call upon His name.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not holier than you,
I'm just a simple sinner
Who received God's good grace, somehow.

It's so weird when I think about who I was about a year ago. I've changed so much it actually freaks me out a bit sometimes. I'm still the same person, most of the same interests, likes, dislikes. But I've matured, and realized so many things about life. And another weird thing is, I'm going to keep changing. So maybe a year from now I'll look back and be amazed at my silliness or ignorance.

On a less serious note, I have vacation this week!! =) Soooo happy!
Pride and Prejudice was amazing. Bekah was incredible, and I laughed a lot. Now I really have to buy the movie. =) Sense and Sensibility is a really good movie, I think you (all the people who love Pride and Prejudice) would love it. =) Maybe. I don't know. Watch it and tell me.
I have no idea what I'm doing this summer, I think I'm leaning toward not being a S-I-T at Berea. =/ Sorry Tori. It's just not working out so far. I'm still praying about it though. Your prayers would be much appreciated!! =)

Finally

My current (it changes often) favorite song, that I have replayed a billion times is "Finally," by Fergie. Now the cover of her single cd cover, is not the greatest...neither really is she. But this song is amazing. And I think if you ignore what she's most likely singing about (her fiancee), you can imagine it's you, to God. (I'm such a sap...) It's the most amazing thing. Here are the lyrics, and the music is beautiful too. I'm not exactly sure what the exact lyrics, because diffrent places have some different lines, and it's not completly crystal clear in the song. So here's what I thought it was.

Finally by Fergie

Ever since I was a baby girl I had a dream
Cinderella theme
Crazy as it seems
Always knew that deep inside that there would come that day
That I would have to wait
Make so many mistakes
I couldn't comprehend
As I watched it unfold
This classic story told
I left it in the cold
Walking through unopened doors that led me back to you
Each one unlocking more of the truth
I finally stopped tripping on my youth
I finally got lost inside of you
I finally know I needed to grow
And finally my maze has been solved

[chorus]

Finally
Now my destiny can begin
Though we will have our differences
Something strange and new is happening
Finally
Now my life doesn't seem so bad
It's the best that I've ever had
Give my love to him finally

I remember the beginning you already knew
I acted like a fool
Just trying to be cool
Frontin' like it didn't matter
I just ran away
Put on another face
Was lost in my own space
Found what it's like to hurt selfishly
I was scared to give up me
Afraid to just believe
I was in a jealous, insecure, pathetic place
Stumbled through the mess that I had made
I finally got out of my own way
I've finally started living for today
I finally know I needed to grow
And finally my maze has been solved

[chorus]

Finally
Now my destiny can begin
Though we will have our differences
Something strange and new is happening
Finally
Now my life doesn't seem so bad
It's the best that I've ever had
Give my love to him finally

I just have to post this before Meghan does. Cuz she threatened she would.
So uhmm, Saturday, I learned something about myself.
I have an irrational fear of turkeys. Especially on the male turkeys, the thing that hangs down from their throat, apparently called the "wattle." ??
I mean it's just creepy!!! And maybe I'm really not afraid of turkeys, they were just very ominous that night...
Get it over with and take a good long, laugh. Then move on. =P

Ephesians 6: 10-13

This morning, (now actually) I felt myself going a bit...nutty. I felt stress from school and basically my life. I realized I needed peace, spiritually peace, so I started reading where I left on in Ephesians, (I love Paul's writings!!!) and I read these verses, and they're just amazing! They have to do with some of what I've been dealing with, and I just can't believe how good our God is. Does any of that make sense? Sorry my thoughts are a bit jumbled. =) Here are the verses!

Ephesians 6: 10-13
Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but agaisnt the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spirtual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

SO AMAZING!!! Ahhhhh!! I'd say more about them, but my mom is telling me to come. I don't know what she wants me to do, but above these verses it says obey your parents...so no commentary for now. =)

Sometimes I wish people weren't so hard to understand.
Sometimes I wish people wouldn't stay quiet and hide their true feelings.
Sometimes I wish society just didn't...exist.
Sometimes I wish I could hide, and ignore all the issues around me.
Sometimes I wish we could just all be the same, no uniqueness...
Maybe then...there would be no jealously, greed, misunderstanding, pain, confusion.
But above all that; when I forget my petty problems, and my selfishness, He's there. He's in it all. He's with me always. If I can only put my pride away, and trust, I'll be ok.
All I want is honesty. Modesty. Love. Forgivness. Mercy. Understanding. THE TRUTH.
Can I only find that in Him? Prove me wrong world. That's all I wish sometimes...

I feel like posting, aren't you lucky? ^_^

My whole family is sickly. 'Cept my dad. Which is really good cuz it's tax season (he's an accountant) and it's his busiest time of the year.
But my mom, myself, Grace and Molly are all sick. So if you could, please pray for us! =) I really want to go to youth group. Who wouldn't????

My mom is making me read Shakespeare for school, and I choose Macbeth to start with, because it's a dark, morbid story. Ok not exactly morbid, but it has a lot of murder. I'm sorry but I like stuff like that!! Too much Monk, Psych and House. Hehehe.
I'm actually really enjoying it! Some of it I have to read twice, or thrice (that's a funny word), but I like it a lot. I tried reading Shakespeare a couple of years ago, and I didn't like it. But now that I'm older I can appreciate it. Maybe it's because I'm a hopeless romantic. (by the way, "romantic" doesn't always have to do with "love," it also can mean, "fanciful; impractical; unrealistic; imaginary; fictitious, or fabulous." thank you dictionary.com)
I don't think everyone can love Shakespeare, unless it's an acquired taste.
But I'm glad I do.

UpDaTe oN mY LiFe

Here's an update on my life, since I don't really know what else to post. Hehe. =)
I can officially drive today! My mom was willing to take me out to some parking lot, but I didn't really want to while it was wet out. Uhmm yeah.
I have acquired a superpower!! It's called "napping." I'm actually slightly digusted with myself because I can't stop myself from falling asleep when I'm on the couch or one of my lovely leather chairs. I think it's just a bunch of things hitting me at once.
I've discovered P.O.D. a Christian rock band. Go check out "Youth of the Nation" it's amazinggggg.
Emma has a blog!!! =) www.narnianwriter.blogspot.com. Go check it out!
I forgot to post that I went protesting at a Jehovah Witness Hall a couple of weeks ago with the Lareau's and their friends. It was really amazing, we didn't yell or anything, just held signs and smiled. If you don't know anything about the Jehovah Witnesses you should....GOOGLE IT!
Gosh I love to Google things. I'm such a Googler. (hehehehe)
I have a lot on my heart right now, so if I don't post for a little bit it's just cuz I have some spiritual and emotional sorting out to do.
I should mention the youth group all-nighter. It was so much fun!!! I felt like I was on drugs (to clarify I really don't know how that feels, HAHA.) the rest of the day, and time was really wacked out. But it was awesome. =)
Later.

Be not afraid of what Sophie can do to you

Meghan has forced me to take action. Well, post action anyways.

YES. I AM DRIVING IN 3 DAYS.
You have nothing to fear....yet.
If you would feel safter staying off the roads for the next 5 years until I move to South Carolina, be my guest.
Though I really don't think that's nessessary.
I mean, it was only a little tree. And the golf cart was fiiiiine.
Ahahah, just kidding. ;)
Yup so just because it's so awesome...I'm going to say it again...

I CAN (legally) DRIVE IN 3 DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

To Go...Or Not To Go Back All The Way To The Computer

Isn't it funny, when you go to the computer with a misson, you get sidetracked by checking blogs, your email, and reading the headlines.
Now you've forgotten what the heck you started out to do.
So you get up, log off the computer, and walk away.
As soon as you get back to the kitchen, you remember what you wanted to do.
Now all you have to do is decide if it's worth it to go back...

La de da la la la...

I'm hyper...and excited! =)

I have good reasons though. Hehehe.

Fudge

Is there anyone on this good green earth that doesn't like fudge?
What? No? Are you sure...?
That's what I thought... =)

Emo Graphic...I don't really know...

Uh yeah, I don't really know what this...is exactly. But I saw it on Google and was bored so yeah...I made some changes to it. Hehe. Tell me what you think.

Junior Mints <3

Oh my goodness...I am now addicted to Junior Mints.

Have you ever had one?? They're so delicious! So minty...and chocolatly. Yum...

So if anyone want's to give me some...feel free. =D

Here's a tip: They taste really good if you squish them in your mouth and you just suck on them...ohhh now I gotta go eat one. Hehehe.

Oh noes...I ate them all. =(

Many Words, Many Meanings

Do people speak just for the sake of speaking?
Do people know what is coming out of their mouths?
...Do people even care?
If you care about me, in any way, you will tell me what I need to hear.
But you will say it kindly, and you will not, be lying.
Say what you mean, mean what you say. Don't take it back.

My Pessimistic Thoughts...Care to Counter Them?

Just when I think the world couldn't possibly be more messed up then it already is..WHAM! I get hit by a surprise attack I wasn't expecting.

Sorry if I'm sounding a bit...pessimistic. You're just going to have to deal with it for now...

Survey

I'm bored, (don't hear that very often from me) and I don't really feel like posting a very, very VERY long post about the famine, so I stole this from Kaeleigh's blog. =) And I'm also changing my blog template because according to Naomi "everyone's blog is black." Besides, I'm sick of this one.


What is on your desktop wallpaper? a picture of my yard that my mom took.

What is your favorite zoo animal? pandas! <3

What was your favorite toy as a child? my beanie babies.

What food do you eat too much of? does tea count? Aha if it doesn't then um...I don't really know.

What kind of hairstyle do you have? layered in the front and back.

What was your favorite activity in gym class? I don't have gym...

What is on the shirt you’re wearing right now? Well, under my Patriots sweatshirt (I don't care that they lost, I'm still rooting for them!!) my gray Billabong shirt.

What is the picture nearest to you of? a picture of me and my friends Bethany and Becky because I never see them anymore. Also a picture of Meghan, Rachel and me, cuz we were about to fall off a tire swing, and it looks so funny.

What kind of salad dressing do you like? Greek, Italian and ranch.

Whats your least favorite food? eggplant, I guess.

What do you do on a Sunday night? dread school the next day.

If you could only use one condiment on your food for the rest of your life, what would it be? butter

What color are your sheets? blue

How big is your computer display? Uh...big enough

What pair of shoes do you wear most often? my beat up digusting sneakers/my chucks

What is your favorite game? I love the winking game, and as of this Saturday, games at the mall. =D

What is your favorite Thanksgiving food? turkey with cranberry sauce...yum

What is your favorite pizza topping? pepperoni, everything or peppers.

What time do you plan on waking up tomorrow? LATE! school vacation!!!!!!

What is your favorite day of the year? How can you have a favorite day? Everyday is amazing in it's own way.

I'm wet and cold...bleck.

I just took my dog Maggie out for a walk with my mom. If all you people have windows then you probably know that the weather is gray and rainy. We went down to the stop sign nearest to my house and I told my mom we should go back because it looked like it was going to rain any second. It did. About 30 seconds after I said that. (Wooo...) So now I'm wet and cold. And I'm telling you that because you all wanted me to post more. You asked for it. =P Random, meaningless posts.

The problem

There is a huge difference between observing the problem, and actually doing something about it.
You can watch the problem play out, maybe getting better, maybe getting worse. You can feel sorry, for all the people the problem has unleashed it's misfortune upon. You can tell other people how they could fix the problem. You could lay it out, step by step for them. You can cry, if the problem is overbearing. You can become furious with the world for letting the problem become bigger and bigger. You can be annoyed with all the people who just sit there and complain. You can comment on the problem, suggesting solutions, or just complain about it yourself.
But I, do not want to hear any of this, if you do not do anything about it yourself.
The problem could be the starving children in Africa, it could be bad grades, pressure from a job or school, pollution, cancer, boredom, money issues, abortion, immodesty. The problem could be anything!!!
I am not saying that you can always do something. In some cases the only thing you can really do is pray. But praying is still doing something! And I'm also not saying that you shouldn't feel sorry for yourself if something in your life isn't ok. I absolutely believe that you should definatly be able to take a day off, or go see a movie, or just take a break. But you shouldn't do that for the rest of your life. If there is something you can do, do it. Don't just sit around and complain. Our generation is going to shape the world for the next 100 years or so. So if we just sit on our couches watching the world get worse and worse, we should be ashamed of ourselves. Just take it step by step, and try to change something people. The first thing you can do is change yourself. From there on, you could change the world.

Steller Kart - Jesus Loves You

I think this song explains what is hard to explain. It's so hard to tell people about Jesus, and most of the time just saying "Jesus loves you" reminds me of the little kid's song, and if people think of it like that, they think of it as a joke. A child's saying that doesn't mean anything. Like Santa Claus, or the boogeyman. Ok not the boogeyman, but something that used to mean something, until you found out it wasn't even real. But this song gives new meaning to the phrase "Jesus loves you," and it reminds me that those three words could change someone's life...So maybe you should say it more often. =)

Steller Kart - Jesus Loves You

Tell me what do you believe in
Does your life have rhyme or reason
Something in your heart that makes you care
I hope that you don’t mind me asking but I’ve got a burning passion
I need to know forever you’ll be there

I can’t make it clearer or put it any other way
If you can’t see the simple truth I do
Then there is nothing in this world that’s left to say
Jesus loves you

I know I don’t have all the answers and
I have wasted many chances to prove to you a fate that lives inside
I pray that there will be break through cause I can’t be the one to save you
God knows how many times I’ve tried

I can’t make it clearer or put it any other way
If you can’t see the simple truth I do
Then there is nothing in this world that’s left to say
Jesus Loves You

I can’t explain I can’t deny so many times for you
I’ve cried and to see you on your knees tonight

I can’t make it clearer or put it any other way
To know you know the simple truth I do
To know that you’re forever has been changed
Cause Jesus loves you

MY CELL PHONE!

I got a cell phone!! My first ever, wonderful cell phone. =) =)
It's an LG Verizon. The one with the keyboard. It's a very lovely green color. It's actually the same one as Brianna, but I wanted the green one before I knew she had it. Just saying. Haha.
Part of my wants to name it, but don't worry, I do realize how obsessive that probably is. Still...
I'm so excited, do you realize how much fun texting is? =)
Email me if you want my number. Heehee...my number.
Kidding kidding!!! =P

Just be happy that I'm posting and don't care if it's not a very long post.

To post about Deep Freeze, would be a very long post.
I would show you pictures, but because of my lack of camera, I can't.
So you'll have to be satisfied with these few words.

DEEP FREEZE WAS AMAZING!!!!!! As always, so uplifting, inspiring!
Soooo much fun and just obviously awesome! ...AAhhhhh! If you can make sense of that, good for you.

The band, Attaboy, was so cool, and the speaker Joel has been called a female Jodi, though I have to disagree because there's no one like Jodi. =P

Ok well peace, and go Google Attaboy.

This post is for Ashlee and all you who believe in me

Don't give up on my blog Ashlee!!!

Sorry I haven't posted..major drama and business has kept me away.
No excuse I know. Can't post this weekend cuz I'll be at Deep Freeze!!!!!!!
Woot Woot.

Did you know that cats stalk people? It's quite scary actually. Since they walk very quietly you never know they are following you and you only know they are there when you turn around and scream. Ok maybe not scream, but jump a little. Cats really are queer animals...Get one and find out. =)